According to the UK's Daily Mail, a newspaper, an Aspiring MP who unsuccessfully stood as a male Tory candidate campaigns again as a 'proud lesbian Green party hopeful'.

This was achieved simply by the candidate wearing a strap-on, which led to another female Tory MP calling this person 'a man who wears an appendage'. She was forced to apologize to strap-on manufacturers after an online pile-on and being sent lots of clips of strap-ons in use.

Apparently wearing a strap-on now automatically qualifies you as a lesbian and sales are going through the roof as many other potential parliamentary candidates explore using this simple technique as a means of capturing the vital lesbian vote.

Australian strap-on enthusiast Bill "Double-Dick" Heslop told FNN:

Due to premature erectile dysfunction, I've been wearing a strap-on for years.

But I never realised this qualified me as a lesbian and could improve my chances of being elected to public office. Go figure.

Hey Muriel! Fetch me a tinnie. I'm parched.