The University of Dumbledore has announced a new masters degree in the Music and Songs of the Sex Pistols that it hopes will encourage more people to learn about the masters of Punk from the mid-1970s. This follows hot on the heels of the University of Texas offering a course on Taylor Swift's songbook.

The Pistol's course will enable students to complete a dissertation on the following topics:

• Is the Queen really a human being?
• Was Belsen a gas?
• Is it va-cant or va-cunt?

Former Australian punk, Bill 'Battler' Heslop told FNN:

This course is a load of bollocks! You want to understand the songs? Then get smashed, pogo up and down and spit at everything in sight. I trained my pet wallaby to do it. Hey Muriel! Fetch me a tinny. I'm parched!