Apple is expected to launch new features on the iPhone 16 to ensure that premium users will upgrade to the latest handsets.

These features are rumoured to include:

• the ability to make phone calls (a legacy addition in response to user demand)
• the handset glowing whenever data is not being sent to Apple
• everything you do being used to train the new Apple Intelligence (at no cost to you)

User testing has revealed that the phones glow almost all the time, even at night, which could result in early failures of the LEDs used to provide the glow but does mean the phone can double-up as a night light. Bonus!

EU spokesperson, Ursula Von Richthofen, supports the capabilities of the new iphones saying:

Here in the EU we welcome any opportunity to get more data about what users are doing so we will will shortly introduce EU directive 93746556949 to compel Apple to route all data supplied from iphones to Apple Intelligence via EU servers so we can analyze it for right-wing bias or Russian disinformation.