FNN has learned that a less publicized clause in the ban on adult entertainment venues by Edinburgh Council relates to the wearing of kilts.

It will now be illegal to wear a kilt without any 'scants' underneath.

A council spokesperson told FNN:

The ban on strippers and adult entertainers also extends to men who wear kilts with no underclothing. As you know, the wind can whistle up Princes Street and easily lift a kilt to reveal what lies underneath.

The mental distress this can cause shoppers is unacceptable so we recommend that all kilts-wearers have some boxers underneath or risk an on the spot fine. We don't want that scene from 'Carry On Up the Khyber' here in our Scottish high streets.

Bill "Jock" Heslop, Australian kilt supplier commented:

More effing woke nonsense. Anyone who wears a kilt knows that the way you stop it billowing up to reveal your tackle is to weight your sporran with a few pies or macaroon bars. Hey Muriel! Fetch me a tinnie. I'm parched!