Ukrainian tank crews being trained on the UK's Challenger tank at Bovington camp in Dorset have been pleasantly surprised by the level of facilities built into the tank's crew accommodation.

FNN has learned that Greggs is one of the sub-contractors who have worked on the tank in order to integrate the following:

• a latte-making machine
• a microwave to cook bacon rolls
• a Goblin teasmade for when it's time for a 'brew' (not a 'brew-up' you understand as this has a slightly more unpleasant meaning to tank crews)

In order to fit the kitchinette inside the tank, the Challenger cannot carry any spare ammunition, but who cares as long as the crew can be properly hydrated and fed with tasty snacks. So once it has fired the one in the spout, all the crew can do is have a cup of tea while they wait to be resupplied.

Former Australian tank commander Bill "Guderian" Heslop commented:

WTF! They'll have a beer barrel in there next. A tank is a fighting vehicle not a mobile kitchen. But then I reckon these facilities are useful since these pommie tanks spend most of their time broken down and waiting for repair unlike our bonzer Bushmasters.

Hey Muriel! Fetch me a tinnie. I'm parched.