The UK's National Treasure, the National Health Service, has decided to bill all patients at point-of-delivery after polls discovered that users overwhelmingly believed that healthcare was free and costs nothing to deliver.

When announced at the press conference, this welcome news prompted a burst of spontaneous clapping from the news hacks taking the knee at the event. 

Despite a 2020-21 NHS budget of some £200 billion in England alone, users failed to see why they should contribute to the costs of their healthcare, as one user said: "I don't pay income tax or national insurance so why should I pay for my healthcare and wait for treatment for weeks on end?"

Another pointed out: "Just because I make life choices to drink excessively and binge-eat on fast food sitting on the sofa in front of the telly, I don't see why the NHS should lecture me about healthy habits."

NHS spokesperson Winston Ndugu explained that although all services would now be billed at point of delivery, nobody would actually be charged for them except privileged old white men as they should be charged for everything, the cracker bastards.

The new NHS billing system is expected to cost £1 billion to implement and should reach break-even in 2121.