Sadly, after a successful coronation in London, King Charles has decided to abdicate as the job is not all it was cracked up to be.

He has sent a letter to the HR department at Buckingham Palace to give them the obligatory 3 months notice.

In a tearful abdication speech, the King told the nation that the reasons for his decision include:

• the crown doesn't fit
• Camilla hates travelling by horse-drawn carriage even if it is net-zero
• he wants to move into the shed in his garden at Highgrove and talk to the plants
• he fears that the sequel to Spare will be worse than the original

This means another multi-million pound coronation will be needed but at least it ensures another bank holiday for his grateful subjects so there is no need to go on strike. Bonus!