Russian philosopher Derek "Dawkins" Dugin (not to be confused with legendary Wolverhampton Wanderers player Derek "The Doog" Dougan) has published a new book entitled:

Democracy: The Selfish Gene.

Dugin's thesis is that democracy is not a malignant virus from a biolab as some conspiracy theorists have claimed but in fact a selfish gene that does anything it can to ensure its self-perpetuation, which includes killing anything that gets in its way and even itself if it ensures the long-term survival of the democracy gene.

Mutations of democracy, such as communism and fascism, are weeded out by natural selection which is itself a perpetuator of the selfish gene's strive to survive.

Dugin's new book consists of 12 main sections:

1. Why are people? - A good question to which no-one knows the answer
2. The replicators - US hegemony as a democracy Xerox machine
3. Immortal coils - that, like Taliban prisoners, we shuffle on and off
4. The gene machine - perfected by Levis, McDonalds, Starbucks and other US brands
5. Aggression: stability and the selfish machine - there's no such thing as a defensive alliance
6. Genesmanship - the great gene game, like Risk but a bit more serious
7. Family planning - the plan to get rid of that pesky mom and pop family unit
8. Battle of the generations - you pay for my pension with your mental health
9. Battle of the sexes - much more complicated today as there are more of them
10. You scratch my back, I'll ride on yours - the philosophy of NATO explained
11. Memes: the new replicators - the truth loses and fake news wins
12. Nice guys finish first - as if!
13. The long reach of the gene - aka let's get a hold of those Siberian and Arctic resources