FNN was saddened to hear that former PM Tony Blair and parliamentary comedian William Hague - Bill and Ben The Flowerpot Men - have renewed the call for ID cards as they have forgotten who they are and need a card to remind them.

Despite most people having driving licences and passports and Tesco loyalty cards, apparently there is a need for another ID card mainly to help the old and forgetful remember who they are.

A spokesperson for Tony Blair's Spare Change Foundation, publisher of "The Big Lie" magazine sold outside pharmacists, told FNN:

ID cards are an essential way for individuals to remember who they are and of course, what gender they are at the moment, as this can all become very confusing these days.

A spokesperson for William Hague ignored our question about ID cards and responded:

This one's a cracker. Two goats are eating from garbage bins when one of them finds a roll of film and starts to eat it. One goat asks "How is it?" and the other goat replies "Not as good as the book". Hilarious.

Believe me, there was no need to watch porn in the House of Commons when William had the floor or was reversing into Peter Mandelson.