A candidate for the Tory leadership has admitted that she led a normal life until she got a job with the Conservative Party and became a self-confessed 'toe-rag'.

A spokesperson explained:

Becoming a toe-rag is not easy. It's not just about cleaning toilets and flipping burgers.

You have to learn to shoplift, ram-raid, wear a shell suit and trainers, sell stolen crap in pubs and drink alcopops laced with lighter fuel.

But having experienced life as a toe-rag is just what our next Tory leader needs to 'get down with the homies' to appeal to post-Brexit Britain's voters and learn a little 'humility'.

Famous Australian toe-rag Bill "The Sweeney" Heslop told FNN:

Shut it you slag!

I'm The Sweeney, son, and I haven't had any dinner. You've kept me waiting, so unless you want a kicking you tell me where those photographs are.

Cor, that Sheila has got some lunch on her!

Hey Muriel! Fetch me a tinnie. I'm parched.