Apple has warned users that there is a serious security breach in all of its hardware devices that means that all user data is available to Apple.

It turns out that all kinds of data stored on Apple devices is being sent to Apple, the CIA, Facebook, GCHQ, Google and many other global data harvesters without explicit user knowledge but in line with those terms and conditions that everyone clicks Yes to but no-one ever reads because if you did, you would never use anything.

A spokesperson for Apple told FNN:

We are truly sorry to admit that user data from all Apple hardware devices is being harvested by Apple and our other 'data partners' in line with our terms and conditions that are written in a very small font.

We know this will come as a shock to many but also as a relief to others who are happy that it is Apple and other trustworthy tech giants like Amazon, Facebook and Google that are harvesting their data to build up a profile of their buying habits and target them with online advertising rather than some Russian hacker using it to influence US elections.

EU spokesperson Ursula Von Richthofen commented:

As you know, the EU has the strongest data privacy rules in the world and ensures that all data stored on devices used in the EU is routinely uploaded to a special EU-Cloud server farm located in Berlin from which we can target users with appropriate advertising for necessities such as juicy bratwursts and delicious curry sauce. Vorsprung durch Teknik!