UK PM Sir Keir Starmer is threatening to put UK boots on the ground in the Ukraine.

A spokesperson clarified:

Sir Keir did not mean that anyone would be filling these boots.

The Ukranians have offered us a field where we can dump a load of old Army surplus boots that are clogging up our warehouses.

We haven't got enough recruits to fill the boots we have.

Well. Everyone thought it was Trump or Putin or Xi that would start WW3 but Starmer has elbowed his way to the front of the line.

He clearly wants a war, like Thatcher's Falklands, to restore his reputation with flag waving crowds congregating at Victoria coach station to see the troops off on their newly painted Union Jack double-decker buses.

Trouble is, fighting the Russians is not the same as taking on a handful of brave Argentinian pilots.

He must be suffering from Churchillian delusions of grandeur thinking this will earn him a seat at the negotiating table so he can carve up Eastern Europe on the back of an envelope with Trump and Putin while chomping on a cigar and enjoying a brandy.

Dream on Starmy.

Starmer should resign and start learning how to make a decent latte before it's too late.